So Its happened about five times in the past two weeks. I see someone I havent seen in a while and they ask....

"Are you still with your boyfriend?"
and I say
"yup, almost five years."
then they say
"are you engaged yet!?" or "when are you getting engaged?!"

awkward I know...

So I kind of stand there all weirded out and just reply....

"nope, were in no rush."
But the truth is a part of me wants to say "yes, actually we are!"

Then I stop and realize that wont happen. Not anytime soon anyhow.
Honestly I would enjoy being engaged. I mean I know were young but we have grown up with each other as much as our love for each other has.....five years. Most people get engaged when they are simply two years long.
I dont know. Typing this makes me feel ashamed and a bit silly, but the question seems to keep popping up everywhere.
Crazy thing is, if it isnt someone asking me the question its situations that remind me of it.
For example. A friend of my boyfriend came into my job for an upgrade on his phone....with his wife.

They started to talk about how much they loved each other and how they were married and living together and all and then they asked me (hahaha) how long we were together...when I said almost five years they kind of starred at me confused.
I laughed it off with a "yeah, haha he better get on it!"
-__-

Its so funny when I think about how many times ive been asked that same question.
Some people might find me nuts to even say this at age 20 but my boyfriend and I see each other as our "one and onlys" so why not?
When I say engaged, I dont mean be engaged for two months and then get married.
I think of being engaged as a baby step towards being defined as a whole. I think a couple should be engaged for 2-4 yrs. Its a good amount of time to get ready for whats to come and not to mention save money on the wedding itself :).

With that time, you have a chance to plan and achieve things that you want to achieve before you officially become one :)
You need that time to say "okay, were serious now and were gonna iron our the kinks before we take this leap together."

With so many people asking me I almost wonder why were not....?

As a secret in my head that ive never told anyone, I cant ever see him asking me....

Not that he does'nt love me because I know he does, alot. I just cant see him making such a big decision...and I sure as hell would never pressure him into it. I cant see him sitting down and thinking "I love this girl so much and its who I want to be with for the rest of my life and im ready to ask her to be mine forever..."
Maybe im wrong (I hope im wrong) and maybe hes already thinking of it....and maybe I should stop building myself up for a big fall lol.
it might take this boy 5 more years...

"[W]hen you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible"
-Nora Ephron

She sat there, laughing. The lights from the T.V danced across the living room walls. She didnt understand a word anyone was saying, but she laughed at all the right parts. Thats what I love about her. No worries is what comes into mind when I look at her. Her hands held years of labor, her face held wrinkles that stood for every year, but she was still happy. What does she think when she sits there with a blank face expression, or when she stares outside......"we live in a beautiful world".

Does she know that her hourglass is almost filled up?

Does she remember her times as a young girl? I stand in front of her with so much ahead of me while she sits there with so much behind her. My hands heldhers, time is wasting away. "we live in a beautiful world". Look at those birds.. look at the lives of those leaves, they turn green to yellow to red then to brown....gone. Will this be your last chance to see this? Holdthese memories....becuase I will.

Does anyone realize this? Were born, ignorant to everything....... look at the stars. They may not be there tomorow. That very moment I wished  I could take her anywhere so she can think what I think....we live in a beautiful world. Wake up early, hold someone you love, just stop and realize that everyday the sun comes up changing from pink to red. Stop, just stop. Watch the waves come up onto shore...... so many cant see this view. I look up to see he looking up at me........ we both think the same thought.....we live in a beautiful world.

 

I don't know! I DON'T KNOW! I'm lost! I'm scared! I feel like I'm disappearing! MY SKIN COMING OFF! I'M GETTING OLD! Nothing makes any sense to me! NOTHING MAKES ANY SENSE!

are we....the dining dead?

Clementine: What took you so long?
Joel: I just walked in.
Clementine: Do you miss me?
Joel: Oddly enough, I do!
Clementine: You said "I do" - I guess that means we're married!
Joel: I guess so!

Clementine: Let me show you something... come on...
Joel: I think I heard a crack.
Clementine: It's not gonna crack, or break, or... it's so thick!... Show me which constellations you know.
Joel: Um... oh... I don't... know any.
Clementine: Show me which ones you know!
Joel: Okay... okay... oh! There's Osidius.
Clementine: Where?
Joel: Right there... see? Sort of a swoop and a cross, Osidius the Emphatic.
Clementine: You're full of shit, right?
Joel: Nope. Osidius, right there, swoop and cross.
Clementine: Shut the fuck up!

Clementine: Joely?
Joel: Yeah Tangerine?
Clementine: Am I ugly?
Joel: Uh-uh.
Clementine: When I was a kid, I thought I was. I can't believe I'm crying already. Sometimes I think people don't understand how lonely it is to be a kid, like you don't matter. So, I'm eight, and I have these toys, these dolls. My favorite is this ugly girl doll who I call Clementine, and I keep yelling at her, "You can't be ugly! Be pretty!" It's weird, like if I can transform her, I would magically change, too.
Joel: [kisses Clementine] You're pretty.
Clementine: Joely, don't ever leave me.
Joel: You're pretty... you're pretty... pretty...

Hey everybody, my sister just joined us livejournalans!!!! woo hooo! =D. Well loves, tomm is school and I missed my bus today bcuz I overslept...gah. >.<. So im off to finish w/e I have to do so I can g2 sleeeeeeeep. L8er  <3's.

 

                                          p.s <3

                 

This is freinds only.....<3